J and I are taking a break. I've never actually understood what that term meant when used in relationships, but in our case it means not talking for a week and then seeing where we are. It's a week right now, but this is kind of a test. It could just as easily become shorter or grow longer, I really don't know at this point. My therapist gave me the idea and when I mentioned it to him I could tell he liked it... which hurt my feelings. I had hoped he would say he hated the thought of not having any contact with me... that he would miss me too much. But I knew he wouldn't. I always want him to say something like that. I want so badly to feel like he needs me like I do him, but I don't. I refuse to sit around feeling sorry for myself and miss him this week. I'm seeing friends, volunteering, and getting a job, damnit.
I still haven't thought of anything to write for therapy. When I really get an urge to write lately I write in my journal or get on here. This is probably a little sad, but even though I have no followers yet I feel a sense of accomplishment when I see my blog get longer and my profile views go up. It's like I've finally stuck to something and something good may come of it. I hope so.
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